Fertility Chronicles: Part 6

This coming Monday will mark 2 weeks since I started my daily Lupron shots. The only side affect I've experienced is headaches. I'm just happy to be off of the Doxy!! It made me jittery, anxious and a bit nauseous! Today, I had my baseline ultrasound and blood work. According to the Dr., I have gorgeous ovaries and a perfect uterus. Aw shucks, that's what all the boys say! My estridol level was good, so I was cleared to start the Follistim on Saturday evening. So, in the morning, my Lupron will drop from 10u to 5u and in the evenings I'll give myself 100u of Follistim. Next Wednesday, April 1st, I'll have my first monitoring visit and then go in every other day until they decide that my follicles where they need to be and I get my instructions to take Ovidrel. Three days after that is egg retrieval. I'm getting really excited! It still doesn't seem real somehow. I was on the table today waiting for the Dr. to come in and just thought.."Holy crap..I'm really doing this. Woah."

Jeff sounded so excited when I told him I was cleared for take off that it made me smile and I wished that I'd been there to give him a hug. He was gone before I got home this morning, so I have to wait until tomorrow morning to see him. We've been discussing names and I keep getting frustrated. I can think of girls names all day long..but never any boys names. I just feel like we'll have a girl. Jeff's mom says it'll be a boy b/c boys run in their family. Ok..well girls run in ours. Even though the sex is determined by the man, b/c we're doing ICSI, it's a total toss up and even more random. They just pick 1 sperm from the group and inject it into the egg. There's no telling what the sex is more likely to be. I really want a girl..Jeff wants both..LOL. I'm still fine w/ twins even though I know it'll be really hard, at least I'd know we don't have to go through this all again...we'd be done!

I also found out that our insurance and the bank have already paid our Dr's office, so Jeff is now clear to take another job if he finds it. His last day is April 17th anyway and until we found out it was paid, he was going to be force to say until the last day to make sure our insurance lasts..but since it's paid, he's free to move on. He's had several people interested, so we'll see what happens. A lot of people have really questioned our decision to do this now considering the current state of the economy and the fact that Jeff may not have a job that pays as much. It might not make sense to you, but it was just the right time for us. God's timing is perfect and I can't question that. He's opened many doors to make this possible, even if it seems like it's a bad time. He's holding my hand through all of this and showing me the way and I feel content about it.

I feel like in a world where children have an overinflated sense of entitlement and self importance, and who aren't held accountable for their actions, I need to have a child who understands that if they do wrong, there's consequences and if they do right, rewards. They need to know that the things that are given to them are earned by hard work and dedication. No one else seems to grasp that concept so I think there should be at least one person who can act responsibly and lead others to do the same. I hope I can be the kind of parent who raises a child to be a great leader, be responsible, trustworthy, honorable and fair. Most parents probably wish that of their children but it doesn't work out that way very often.

Based on experience, somehow the world has started rewarding the lazy and punishing the hard workers. The ones who speak up, stand up for themselves, work hard, and try to change things for the better get labeled as trouble makers, tattle-tales, whistle blowers and usurpers. The ones who don't care enough to say anything and keep their mouth shut and do just enough work to get by, they somehow get privileges and pats on the back for doing NOTHING. This society is based on getting stuff for nothing and has a weak work ethic...and it has to change.

Take NC's governor for example. She depleted the education fund to pay for parole reform, based on what 2 people did while on parole. So..now the kids are in schools with leaky roofs, not enough classrooms, and not enough teachers while the money is basically going to the criminals who do nothing to contribute to the good of society. It makes no sense to take the money from children who have a chance to change the world and give it to people who have little chance of being a productive member of society. So again..the lazy get rewarded. Without education or discipline, these students have a higher chance of being on parole one day..and it just perpetuates the cycle. And then, they wonder why NC has some of the lowest test scores in the country! So..to make up for the money taken from the education fund, new taxes have been put in place. Why?? So she can rape the fund again?? It angers me to no end and THAT is why I want to have a child.

I have high hopes that between Jeff and I, we can raise a child that can make great changes in this world. I think that's why I am SO excited and empowered over the thought of being a mother. Even if my child doesn't change the world, I know they'll at least make it a better place and that just inspires me. Please keep us in your prayers and I'll update next week after my monitoring visit!

Lengthy Update

It's been over a month since my last update, but I've just had a lot going on. Good news first I guess...which should be obvious if you can see my profile picture..but Kelly had her baby! Sept. 25th...a very adorable little girl named Noel Hollyn. She looks so much like Tim! Kelly's due date came and went and I was on stand by waiting for a call. Around 4:45 am on the 25th Mom called me and I was ready and out the door an hour later. I'd been packed for a few days, just in case b/c I didn't want to have to drive home from work to pack..so I just took it w/ me.

Anyway, 4.5 hours later, I was at the hospital trying to be there for Kelly while she was in labor but I didn't want to be too intrusive. I ended up dozing off in the waiting room and Tim came to tell me Noel was here! I couldn't wait to see her! After a few hours there and dinner w/ Mom & Dad, I made my way over Afton Mountain..at night and in the rain (yikes) to Leslie's house. It was sooo good to see her!! We chatted a bit before bed, then the next day, back to the hospital. Jeff came down the day after and we visited w/ Kelly a bit before dinner in Charlottesville at West Main and then a trip back over the mountain..again at night and in the rain.

Saturday, we couldn't get up with Kelly or Tim, so we hung out at Leslie's with Matt and had dinner with them when Leslie got home. I'm glad I got to spend some time with them and catch up a bit since it's so rare that I get to. Their house is awesome! Leslie's done a great job with landscaping and decorating!! Sunday was an uneventful trip home, then we crashed, downloaded photos, had dinner, etc. Not much to tell. Since then, it's just been work, scheduling conflicts with holidays..and election, politics, gas prices and gov't spending hullabaloo.

Since we got back from Kelly's and this bailout thing happened, I've been really on edge. Anxious, worried, unable to sleep..sick. I also developed a UTI this past weekend..probably unrelated..but to continue..I've had headaches every day since we got back. I was anxious about Kelly having the baby..had a knot in my stomach b/c I didn't know when it was going to happen. She had Noel, the knot went away. Then the bailout happened. Headaches. Dizziness. Nausea. Loss of appetite. The headaches aren't constant..but I get one everyday...and it's always accompanied by the dizziness and nausea. At first I thought sinuses, but I'm not congested..allergies? No..I'm on allegra. So..at the Dr. this past Friday for my UTI, I told her how I'd felt. She gave me antibiotics for the UTI..and decided that the rest of the symptoms were probably brought on b/c I couldn't sleep..so she gave me a prescription for Ambien. I took it this weekend and slept great. Last night I didn't take it, but I slept all night last night and most of today. She said if that didn't solve the problems, to come back for anxiety meds...which I'd rather not be on.

It wasn't until I got back from the Dr. that I realized the stress of what our government's doing was probably cause for the anxiety. I disagree w/ McCain's health plan. I don't trust Obama. Palin is a ditz who I would NOT want to see in the White House and running this country if McCain dies. Biden..eh..no feelings either way. Every candidate promises tax cuts, but that's impossible. Since the beginning of time, things have gotten more and more expensive..so to cut taxes when you know things are going to cost more..is a lie. However...there are more people in this country now than there ever have been, so how come they claim to not have enough money?? Why do they need more taxes? The money is mismanaged and pissed away. Even after the bailout..in which the CEO's of these companies were walking away w/ approx. 17 million each...AIG asked for even MORE money. How can 85 BILLION not be enough!??!!? I don't get it.

What has this country come too?? I used to laugh when Jeff would make jokes about the 'Revolution' and about the 'need' to build a bunker in the backyard to stock ammo. Now I'm thinking he may be more right than I gave him credit for. To think on a smaller scale, let's just look at NC for a minute. In the past 4 years, NC's taxes have been raised 5 Billion dollars. Our gas prices are still $.29 above the national average...around $3.60 when everywhere else is about $2.60. We're even higher than California right now!! Only Alaska and Hawaii have more expensive gas than us. A few months ago, they said that b/c of the gas prices, fewer people were driving and therefore the tax that goes to help maintain roads was in a deficit...so one of their possible solutions was to tax NC residents PER MILE that we drive. ?!?! Obviously, that didn't fly. How could they? There's no way to know if those miles were in the state or out of state...and it's punishing people for trying to live their lives.

On an even smaller scale, our county is wanting to charge a homeowner a tax for selling a home...I guess as punishment for leaving the county...who knows. They're also delaying the property reevaluations this year because property values have gone down..which means taxes would decrease..which means less money for them. However, somehow ours till went up by $100 this year. I also want to mention the stupid Zoning Ordinance & Subdivision Regulations that have been proposed.

Stupid stuff like..if you build a gas station, the pumps CANNOT be seen from the street, but must be behind the building and the gas station sign cannot be bigger than 4 feet square and no taller than the building. Um..so if it's a new station, and I can't see the pumps..or the sign..how am I supposed to find it?? Basically..they're trying to turn us into Cary. Cary unofficially stands for Containment Area for Relocating Yankees. People move here to get away from places like Cary..then try to turn us into them. I don't get it. There's another one stating that if your property borders a creek, you must give a half mile clearance from the point where you build your home. So, the county's saying someone can't build their house within a half mile of a creek, stream or river..even though they own the property to the creek's edge...and they're not going to pay them for loss of property?!?! Just makes me angry. Sigh...I'll move on..I could keep going, but it just sets me off, so I'll stop.

I also found out from Mom Sunday that my grandma's lost weight. She said the swelling in her legs went down..which is good...but the weight loss is not. She also said that last week when she went to visit around 10am, Grandma was in bed. The nurse said she'd been in bed the entire day before too. Mom took her and Grandpa up on Roanoke Mountain for a picnic and said Grandma didn't eat but a bite or two. Then, the next day when Mom stopped by, she wouldn't talk either. Anyone who's met my grandma knows that she almost never shuts up. It sounds like she's depressed. Mom said she perked up during the picnic a bit. She's been in that nursing home for over a year and Grandpa keeps saying he wants to get a place where they're both taken care of, but I don't think he means it. He's still in that big house alone and they can't take care of each other..which is why she's in the nursing home.

Honestly, I think they need to be together..but Grandpa can't stand being around her. You can't carry on a conversation with her anymore..which is hard since she talks nonstop..but now she doesn't make sense. And I know it has to be hard seeing her like that. She's just a shell of who she used to be and that has to hurt him. Physically, he can't get around, but mentally, he's still sharp. I know Mom's worried, but I don't know what can be done...if anything. Mom's worried about Grandma, worried about me b/c I've been sick, worried about Kelly and the baby..and there's nothing I can do to relieve her anxiety...which compounds my anxiety. Sigh....The only thing keeping me going right now is knowing I have a two week vacation coming up and a trip back to the mountains with Jeff. I'm also going to try to make it back up to Kelly's, but we'll see if I can afford it by then.

I think that's enough of an update for now and probably more drama and typos than you asked for and maybe if I updated more often this wouldn't happen. I just get in these moods where I don't really feel like writing. C'est la vie. Till next month....au revoir.

OMG. Excellent headline!

As posted on www.wral.com
Police arrest man for allegedly trying to sell 'crackburgers'

Posted: Today at 2:01 p.m. Updated: Today at 2:20 p.m.

Benson, N.C. — A Fayetteville man has been arrested after police said he tried to sell drugs concealed inside hamburger buns to undercover deputies in Benson on Saturday.

Ishmail Middleton, 27, of Fayetteville was charged with four counts of trafficking cocaine and maintaining a vehicle to keep a controlled substance.

Sheriff's Narcotics Capt. A.C. Fish said he had never seen drugs concealed inside hamburger buns before.
"He was trying to hide it inside of a trash bag," Fish said. "We called it a 'crackburger.'"

The undercover operation began when a narcotics agent ordered 1.5 ounces of powdered cocaine from a suspected supplier. Police said Middleton drove from Fayetteville to deliver the drugs, worth an estimated $3,500, to narcotics agents waiting on Church Street.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! The comments left are too funny too. This was written by Wags:

How about a Quarter Pound of Crack with Cheese or a Filet-o-Crack or McCrack or a Southern Style Crispy Crack Sandwich or Chipolte BBQ Snack Crack Wrap. (say that real fast three times when you are on crack). How bout some breakfast? Sausage McCrackin, Bacon Egg and Crack Biscuit with a side of (here it comes) HASH Browns...ha, ha, ha, ha!!! I'm killin me.

What I'd like to know is..would you have the right to complain if there's a hair on your crackburger??

Rising Sea Level Redefines N.C.Coast

The following was printed in today's News and Observer, written by Wade Rawlins. The link is:
http://www.newsobserver.com/news/story/589840.html

By the way..this is very very long!!

Rising sea level redefines N.C. coast

If climate predictions hold, the transformation of islands and rivers will speed up
In North Carolina, global warming isn't a future worry. It's already lapping ashore.

Nags Head Mayor Renee Cahoon sees all the proof of climate change she needs at the end of Old Oregon Inlet Road. The street once led to rows of oceanfront houses. Now it ends suddenly in bulldozed piles of sand.

Some beach erosion occurs naturally, and development near the ocean tends to make it worse. But some scientists think erosion has grown more pronounced in recent years as the sea level has risen and storms increased. On some days, stretches of Nags Head have no dry beach, and visitors have to sit under the front-row houses at high tide. The resort that once thrived by the sea is being swallowed by it.

"We are losing the town," Cahoon said. "As sea level rises, our tax base goes away."
Other, more subtle changes are under way along the coast, not just on the fragile barrier islands. As salt water pushes farther upriver, some rivers are widening into estuaries, tidal bodies of water where fresh and salt water mix. Freshwater swamps are changing to salt marsh.

"The shore is the line of conflict where this crisis is taking place," said geologist Stan Riggs, designated a distinguished research professor at East Carolina University. "We can't think we're going to hold the line."

Scientists predict that the buildup of carbon dioxide gas in the atmosphere will lead to higher global temperatures. That warming will cause seas to rise faster and increase erosion driven by storms.

Changes are already occurring. The world's oceans rose about 6 inches to 8 inches during the 20th century. In North Carolina, the ocean has grown higher by about 8 inches in the past century, because much of the coast is also slowly sinking as the land settles.

A panel of international scientists projects the seas will rise 7 to 30 inches in the next century unless there is a substantial reduction in the emission of man-made greenhouse gases such as carbon dioxide. Those gases spew from our cars, power plants and appliances, accumulating in the atmosphere and trapping heat.

Hundreds of scientists from 40 countries this year proclaimed that climate change is "unequivocal." Global air and water temperatures are inching up, causing seas to warm and expand, and polar ice to melt -- triggering higher sea levels.

There's still debate over how much of the observed change in temperature is due to man-made carbon dioxide and how much comes from the natural cycles of weather. But there's little argument that North Carolina's water, air, food and land are being altered. And more rapid change is predicted.

Swamps turn salty
Gray trunks of dead cypress trees line the shore of the Northeast Cape Fear River a few miles upstream from downtown Wilmington. The trees have been essentially drowned by salt water. Tupelo gum, red maples and other tree species have already disappeared, unable to tolerate the chemical reactions of salt water in soil.

Rising sea levels are pushing high ocean tides of salt water farther up the river.

The soil, exposed to salt, gradually disintegrates, leaving tangles of gnarled cypress roots clinging to air where a riverbank once stood. The disintegrating soil releases carbon dioxide into the atmosphere, adding to global warming. As the trees die, a freshwater swamp changes into a salt marsh.

As the bank crumbles, the river is broadening and transforming into an estuary such as the Pamlico Sound or Chesapeake Bay. The Cape Fear River basin has 200,000 acres of timber that will eventually turn into marsh, said Courtney Hackney, a marine biologist at UNC-Wilmington.

The enlarging estuaries will create more habitat for saltwater fish, crabs and shrimp. But the freshwater swamps will disappear, along with the trees that provide homes for songbirds that thrive there. Ultimately, some landowners will lose their land.

"This swamp was alive when I first arrived and started working on the river in the 1980s," Hackney said as he accompanied a group of students upriver to monitor water levels in swamps. "This has all happened in 30 years, basically. This will all be marsh in five to 10 years."

The Northeast Cape Fear River, which flows into the Cape Fear at Wilmington, is showing effects of rising seawater. The fresh water flowing downriver isn't enough to keep the salt water from intruding upriver.

During the drought of 2001, the researchers detected low levels of salt water more than 16 miles up the Northeast Cape Fear. That's 45 to 50 miles from the ocean.
"We're going through a transition that is far beyond the history of humans on the continent," Hackney said. "There hasn't been salinity where we're seeing it on the Coastal Plain in 50,000 or 100,000 years."

Clues from the past
About 200 miles north of Wilmington, the Great Dismal Swamp is giving researchers from East Carolina University a look into the past, which may offer clues to the future. It's a layer cake of Earth's history.

Vast areas of Eastern North Carolina were ancient ocean beds at a time when sea levels were 20 feet higher. Pete Parham, a graduate student in geology, and Dave Mallinson, an assistant professor, have been drilling east of a low ridge thought to mark an ancient barrier island shoreline that existed between 125,000 and 80,000 years ago.
The line of sand is called the Suffolk scarp. It runs north-south near the present towns of Edenton, Plymouth and Bath.

Mallinson said that about 130,000 years ago, the shoreline was about where it is today. Then, polar regions grew significantly warmer for an extended period. Sea level rose 15 to 20 feet. All or parts of a dozen counties of present-day Eastern North Carolina were submerged, making areas of Gates and Washington counties beachfront.

"Some evidence suggests it rose fairly rapidly up to the Suffolk shoreline," said Mallinson, a geologist at East Carolina University. "That is what we think may be beginning to happen today."

Two factors in rise
Two things are contributing to rising seas. Rising temperatures cause ocean waters to warm and expand, like water heated in a teakettle. Rising temperatures near the poles cause massive ice sheets to melt, adding to the volume of water. Scientists are particularly worried about ice melts in Greenland and the Canadian Arctic, where giant shelves of ice, some the size of Manhattan, have begun crumbling.

"As the Greenland ice sheet melts, that is where the shoreline is going to go," Mallinson said, referring to the ancient shoreline. "Sometime in the next few hundred to 1,000 years, maybe less."

Scientists can observe ancient climate change by studying the layers of sediment. What they don't understand is what triggered the big changes: Did carbon dioxide levels rise in previous eons as a result of warmer temperatures, or did carbon dioxide levels drive temperature increases?

The ECU scientists try to tease answers from the mud, sand, shell and sediment they pull from the depths of the swamp. The drill, mounted in a pickup truck bed, sounds like a jackhammer as it drives the hollow, 2-inch-thick steel tubes into gray mud to collect the samples of sediment. Each 4-foot cylinder contains a snapshot of the time when the sediment was deposited.

"It's important to understand the past sea level cycles so we can better understand the one we're in now," Parham said. "Sea level is rising. We'd like to get an idea what is going to happen. We can do that by looking in the past when sea level was higher than it is today."

Vulnerable Outer Banks
Nowhere are rising sea levels more pressing than the Outer Banks, which are among the nation's most vulnerable land forms. The low-lying barrier islands stretch from Currituck County to Carteret County, and for centuries have defined North Carolina's coastal culture. The most dire scenarios predict collapse of the Outer Banks within a century.

It's a process that has historic precedent. Scientists think the Outer Banks have collapsed and re-formed more than once -- they held far more inlets at the time Columbus landed in the Americas.

The natural tendency of undeveloped barrier islands is to move toward the mainland in response to rising seas. Sand on the oceanfront side gets pushed by waves and blown by wind onto the backside in a gradual, yet massive rolling motion. That pattern has been disrupted on parts of the Outer Banks by artificial dunes, which stop waves from washing across the island and depositing sand on the backside. So the islands grow thinner and thinner.

With global warming, they may grow thinner still. A new study by Laura Moore, a geologist at Oberlin College in Ohio, said sea level rise is the most important factor determining movement of the barrier islands over the next century.

Moore and her colleagues at the U.S. Geological Survey used a computer model to simulate the movement of the Outer Banks over the past 8,500 years. They used the model to predict the Outer Banks' response to various amounts of sea level rise over the next century, as presented by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, the leading source of scientific consensus on climate change.

Moore's study suggests that by the next century, the barrier islands might move toward the mainland up to 2.5 times faster than current long-term erosion rates. That's based on projected sea level rise of 19 to 34 inches. Houses would be washed into the sea more quickly, and highways overtaken by sand, but Moore said the Outer Banks would likely remain intact.

But other scientists, including ECU's Riggs, have said that the international panel's projections are too conservative and that warming might cause the Greenland ice sheet and West Antarctic ice sheet to melt more quickly, possibly causing much higher sea levels by 2100.

Riggs said the rate of sea level rise in northeastern North Carolina around Nags Head and Kitty Hawk is already approaching the climate change panel's midrange predictions for 100 years from now.

A state panel is studying the potential impact of global warming but has yet to make substantial recommendations. Meanwhile, the Coastal Resources Commission, which sets rules for shoreline development, is re-evaluating how close to the shore developers may build houses. And the state spends hundreds of thousands of dollars maintaining the highway that cuts through the Outer Banks.

Higher sea levels turbocharge erosion -- especially during storms -- putting more houses in peril and increasing the costs of maintaining the beaches. Riggs said about 22 miles of the Outer Banks are starting to collapse right now, including narrow, low-lying stretches of Hatteras Island, Ocracoke, Pea Island and Rodanthe. He said only constant bulldozing has prevented the ocean from washing over and cutting through the islands.

Anthony Roper, a state transportation division engineer who oversees the area, doesn't use the term collapse. But transportation officials battle the ocean nearly every year to keep N.C. 12 open. Roper said a half-dozen hot spots on the thinning islands require frequent repairs and rebuilding of dunes to keep them passable.

At Rodanthe, the edge of the highway is about 50 feet from the ocean at high tide. The surf washed over the highway during an extended nor'easter at Thanksgiving, costing more than $1 million to repair.

A little farther north, highway planners propose to replace a stretch of N.C. 12 through Pea Island National Wildlife Refuge by building an elevated highway as the island erodes. In the meantime, the planners project spending $23.7 million to $36.3 million on more sand through 2015 to protect the threatened road.

"The right storm event, if we don't do anything different, we'll have challenges maintaining the road," Roper said.

Riggs holds up a map depicting the disintegration of the Outer Banks, leaving only higher sections of the islands.

"If we had a Katrina-like storm," he said, "it could look like that this summer. This is what nobody in North Carolina is prepared for."

This just saddens me. I LOVE the outer banks..and to think that Okracoke could just be gone one day bothers me.